Lessons I Learned After Quitting my First Job
I quit my first corporate job last year and told myself that I would take a conscious three-month break. I wanted to take a sacred pause to ask myself where I want my life to go. It was a big risk, I had nothing else. I survived four years of my life through the paycheck of that job. Cutting it all off was incredibly scary. I thought I was losing my mind.
In those four years, I was in the same industry, doing almost the same thing each day.
Suddenly – I was doing nothing.
At first, the experience was exhilarating. The moment you realize that you are no longer bound by a schedule, you feel freedom in a whole new way. However, it took just a few days before all the worries manifested themselves.
“Am I good enough to pursue other things? I have been doing this for four years, why did I even think it’s alright to quit? What a stupid decision.”
Going through this is normal, even expected. Yet, whenever I ask myself if I want to go back and beg for my old job back, if some sort of miracle happens and they allow it, I know that I would desire to leave again soon enough. While everything in my life was falling apart and my future remained unsure, I realized a lot and it kept me going.
It’s not too late to start again. You can pivot.
Instead of letting my fears and worries take over me, I tried as best as I could to keep them at bay. I gave myself a brand new start, a new slate to work with. I started asking myself what I wanted and tried to think of the life I want myself to have in 5 years. After painting the picture and asking myself how I could get there, I realized that it was possible. It’s hard – but it’s possible.
It’s possible to begin again. It’s possible to envision a new you – no matter how stuck you thought you were. Sure, it takes a lot of courage but taking the leap is the hardest part. Once you decide to start anew, the actions, big or small, is what gets you to the other side.
It’s okay to ask yourself what you want.
It’s okay to reimagine another life – a life where you are doing what you love the most and chasing your dreams every day. This does not make you a hardcore idealist, as long as you bridge the gap between what’s possible and impossible. We often shrug off the initial thought of living the life we want because we imagine it happening overnight. In reality, it takes time, small steps, and determination. The process may not be easy but it’s worth giving ourselves the chance. No matter how it would turn out, it’s better to have tried than to feel infinitely stuck in a loop.
You can reinvent yourself – you can start living life authentically no matter what stage in your life you are in.
All of us have a side that adheres to society. People know a version of ourselves based on how they knew us at a certain point in time. However, we grow and become different people. As we move forward, our perspectives change, our values change and we might turn into someone far from the image others believe we are. Due to pressure and fear, we sometimes conceal our true selves. It takes a huge amount of effort to keep a facade going and this drains us in the process.
In quitting and showing the world who I am, I realized that liberation is far bigger than the fear of isolation. Being true to who you are is one of the best things you can do for yourself.
You deserve to give yourself a break.
You are not a machine, you are a human being. You need rest to function, you need to recuperate. You are not selfish for needing a pause.
Your worth is not defined by your job, or how long you had it.
What made quitting hard for me is how I have attached who I am to the work that I do. The length of time I built myself up in my first job felt so valuable to me. Letting it all go and starting from scratch hurt my ego. Yet, I had to be perfectly honest with myself. Am I holding on just to keep this invisible sense of worthiness afloat? It is only by realizing that nothing outside of me defines my worth did things begin to make sense.
You are worthy simply because you are. You are not worthy because of your job, how long you’ve held it, and how amazing you are at it. You are simply worthy, as a human being, as someone existing in this beautiful world.
Money is not everything.
That paycheck from the job that sustains you feels like a saving grace, the factor worthy of reconsidering your desire for change. As part of a family, the society as a whole, coupled with our obligations and responsibilities, it is so normal to worry about our finances. Yet, we must also remember that there are things that cannot be seen by the naked eye that deserves our attention too. Our mental and physical health, our relationships, our happiness – all of these and so much more should be considered in the equation. If you can barely motivate yourself to get up in the morning to work if you have been hating yourself and your existence because of the state you are in, it may be time to pause, ask yourself the hard questions, and take time to ask if staying in something that makes you miserable is worth it.
Not everyone has the privilege to quit what they do and pursue something better but it is the responsibility of each of us to take care of ourselves. Even if you can’t make the decision overnight, you can make small subtle changes to take care of yourself more.
Do not give up on your dreams. You can start with what you have then work from there.
Again, you don’t have to give it all up overnight. Not everyone can do that. The best we can do is to take small steps every day to get closer. If everything around you is unbearable, carve a space in your day where you do something that your future self would thank you for. You can start with the cards that you have right now and move forward from there. Each step counts and each step is better than not moving at all.
Taking the big leap to change your life, leave that job, that relationship or whatever it is that makes you feel suffocated is one of the hardest things to do. It may be counterintuitive to say that you should not push yourself to make the move if you can’t but at the end of the day, doing what you can is a step on its own, bringing you closer to where you want to be. If all that you can do right now is to turn off your work notification during your off days, do it. Eventually, you will continue building your resolve and you’ll know when it’s time.
What will bridge your now and your dream is the small actions you take in the middle.
My love, I hope that you enjoyed this blog.
I am so grateful to have this platform to share my insights with you.
If you feel called to receive guidance from your guides about the prominent themes of your life right now, feel free to book a Reading with me. I am honored to read for you x
Love,
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